Anonymous asked: What is your sexual preference?
I’m a boring ol’ cisgender straight male but like… not very masculine? I was raised by bossy Mexican ladies, crotchety Jews, and gay uncles
Anonymous asked: Dude. Same on the crush thing.
Huh. My years of being a sassy curmudgeon are finally paying off!
Everyone should come off anon and let me love you!!
Anonymous asked: Don't you dare say that! You're lovely!
Anonymous asked: I'm too nervous to reveal :(
aw, please don’t be! life is far too short to be nervous.
also… you deserve better crushes. i’m incredibly flattered, but i’m a mess. you shouldn’t want me. i’m not worthy to be crushed.
Anonymous asked: I have a crush on you.
who dis is??
Anonymous asked: An alligator dies. Its tombstone reads "See you later."
wow im sad now